Boosting Your Self-Confidence

By BNI & Referral Institute - Sep 20 , 2007

By Niiraj R Shah

How to Impress Someone without Saying a Word

How do some people appear to be self-confident in every situation? They seem to walk into a room and have confidence oozing out of their pores!

The amazing thing is that being self-confident is a skill that can be learned. Here are some tips to boost your self-confidence in any networking situation. It’s possible to convey a confident first impression without even uttering a word.

Research by communications experts has shown that non-verbal communication, the way you look and the way you move, is more than 80 percent of someone’s first impression of you. Not a single word needs to be said!

People are able to pick up various facets of your personality from the way you look and how you move. We are constantly being bombarded with information, and to make sense of the world we make quick judgments about situations and people. People take an instant mental picture and can make judgments of up to 11 things about you – from what they think you earn even to your personal hygiene –and these impressions can last for a couple of months. So it’s vital that we learn to create a great first impression.

So what are some of the things that you can do with your body language that will immediately boost your self-confidence?

1. Posture your way to self-confidence
The easiest way to project yourself as charismatic and confident is to stand upright, with your shoulders back, head looking up, a smile on your face, and a have a direct, steady gaze.

2. Visualize yourself to self-confidence
Mentally rehearse standing tall and seeing yourself mixing confidently and effortlessly with people. Imagine that you are meeting an old friend, partner, or client that you have lost touch with. Use your senses to make the mental film more vivid and enjoyable. Notice how you are standing and moving in this film as you feel great. You’ll soon find yourself coming across confidently.

3. A self-confidence trick for walking into a roomful of strangers
I often walk into networking functions where I do not know anyone. But I manage to leave with lots of contacts that would love to meet me after. So what was my little trick? I used to walk across the room with a confident posture and with certainty. As I walked, if any of the people made eye contact with me I would smile and nod in acknowledgment. In their minds they would be thinking, “Maybe I know this person? He seems to know me.” I would make a mental note of these people, but I wouldn’t stop until I had reached the other end of the room, and then I would do an about turn and confidently walk back to the person I had acknowledged before and introduce myself with a simple, “Hello,” and a smile.

4. Dress for success
An important way to create the right self-image is to dress for success. Use the help of a personal shopper or personal stylist to help you dress for various occasions. Make sure you know what sort of attire will be worn at your next function. Will it be formal or informal? Dress appropriately for the occasion. Make sure your outfit is well-coordinated. For a formal business function, a dark suit with a simple tie and white shirt with well-polished black formal shoes is generally a good bet for men. Tip: It’s better to be a little overdressed than a little under dressed. A useful question to ask yourself when wondering what to wear is, “What would I wear if I were meeting my number one, best client?”

Finally, make sure that what you wear is in line with the personality and the impression you want to create. Dressing right will certainly help boost your self-confidence.

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Niiraj R Shah, National Director, BNI India is a professional networking coach, international speaker, and a contributing author to the #1 Wall Street Journal bestseller, “Masters of Success.”