Not Getting The Referrals You Want. . . It’s All Your Fault!
By Ivan Misner - Jan 07 , 2009
One of the problems people sometimes have when they establish a referral network is that, once they’ve made contact with all these people who are supposed to start bringing them buckets of referrals, they often believe that any problems they encounter are usually the result of others not doing their jobs.Sorry, but the truth is that if your referral network is not working the way you wanted or expected it to, it’s…well…all your fault.
“My network’s not motivated.” Maybe so, but what are you doing to compel them to refer you? Do you follow up with them on a regular basis? Do you make sure they know you are interested in what they do, rather than just worried about how interested they are in what you do? Are you helping them in the same way you want them to help you. . . are you? Really?
“They don’t know my business.” What have you done to educate them about what you do? Have you kept them abreast of any new products or services you have added? Have you given them information in “bite size” pieces so that they won’t be overwhelmed and likely unable to retain the vital information needed to properly promote your business? Have you provided them with the right amount of collateral material in the form of brochures, pamphlets, and web-based information, so that they can not only educate themselves, but also educate those in their network and extended networks who may be perfect prospects for your business?
You may have met many of your referral sources at your business networking groups. But do you set up times in addition to regular meetings in order to meet with your referral sources, either individually or in small groups, in order to cover areas that you may not have time to cover at the networking meeting?
“The referrals are fickle…they used me only once and never again.” Hmm. Are you sure it is because those new clients were fickle, or did you not do enough to turn a single sale into a regular, loyal client relationship? Did you make sure that prospect was contacted in a timely manner? Did you ensure that the client saw the best you had to offer the very first time? Only you can answer that question.
“They just don’t have the contacts I need.” You’ve gone through their entire database of contacts and disqualified every one, right? Probably not. And if you underestimate who people in your network know—not to mention who the people they know might know, and so on—you are missing out on an exponentially growing number of possible buyers of what you have to sell! And with the explosion of internet marketing, the world is a whole lot smaller. You can now take advantage of contacts your referral sources may have not only in another city, but in another state or even another country!
Without question, it is your obligation to teach your fellow networkers how to refer you. If they’re not doing so, then you are not teaching them effectively. So, in the end, it’s your fault—or, as a passionate, New Age–type business coach once corrected me, “It’s all your responsibility.” OK, I can live with that. Responsibility is something people are sometimes reluctant to take. You’re responsible for many of the actions people take on your behalf. It’s up to you to choose the right people to have around you, to set the tone for your business, to educate your referral partners about what you do, to demonstrate competence and integrity for those representing you, and to maintain the effectiveness and strength of your referral relationships. If there’s a breakdown anywhere in your referral system, it’s because there’s something you overlooked or let slide.
You don’t turn over the responsibility to others and then blame them when things don’t turn out right; instead, you accept responsibility and work with your partners to ensure that the same mistake doesn’t happen twice. You also acknowledge responsibility to anyone who has been wronged, without equivocation. Don’t say, “Mistakes were made.” Say, “It’s my fault that this happened. I apologize for the mistake, and I promise to set things right.” This straightforward acceptance of blame has the added benefit of defusing the other person’s anger; and it’s honest. After all, you created the system that caused the problem. What the injured party wants to hear is acceptance of responsibility and a commitment to correcting the situation—and what the injured party wants to see is action.
One of the strengths of a referral network is that everyone becomes friends. And one of the weaknesses of a referral network is that everyone becomes friends. Only those groups and individuals who recognize that they have to take responsibility, and that there has to be accountability, are the ones who make this process work for them. The people who are constantly blaming someone else for what’s going wrong, who are not taking responsibility for changing or fixing it to make it work, will not do well in referral marketing. Remember, if your referral-marketing program is not working, it’s all your fault! OK, for the more tactful among you, it’s all your responsibility.
Called “The Father of Modern Networking” by CNN, Dr. Ivan Misner is a New York Times bestselling author. He is the Founder and Chairman of BNI, the world’s largest business networking organization. His latest book, The 29% Solution, can be viewed at www.29PercentSolution.com. Dr. Misner is also the Senior Partner for the Referral Institute, an international referral training company. He can be reached at misner@bni.com.
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